Where will THIS take me?

I recently took a drive to Tahoe for the day to hang out with a friend that lives up there. To anyone that knows me, you know very well that I get lost very easily and have no sense of direction when it comes to getting from point A to point B. This roadtrip was no different. I ended up about 20 minutes out of the way and had to turn around and start all over pretty much.

I stopped and got directions from someone that was either high off something or an addict that needed their fix. His directions to me started off pretty good, "You'll need to get back on 395 N..." and then that's when it started going downhill, "at the 7-11 take a left and then you'll go through a stop sign. Go all the way through it and then the next one, wait maybe it's the one after that, well anyways take a right at a stop sign and just go straight and then a left somewhere else so just look for signs." Where is that supposed to even take me? Once I got back on 396 N I stopped again and asked an older lady. Every direction that she gave me ended in a little lesson (i.e. "Get back on 395 N but make sure you are careful when turning, don't get killed," "Go through the roundabout, but those things are tricky so make sure to open your eyes"). Her directions got me where I was going but what about the directions I set out for myself?

I am openly admitting that a lot of the decisions that I have made in my life have made me stop to ask the question "Where is THIS taking me?" Most of the time I have no idea but I came up with a really good answer that has brought me peace in the situation.

When I make poor decisions today, tomorrow, or the next day, I will answer the question of "where will THIS take me?" by simply stating "I'm young and don't need it to go anywhere right now." So cheers to taking on another way of looking at life and having the best experiences I can while being young and stupid.

Do you want to have a slumber party in my basement?

So music is a big part of my life. I love to sing, I love to play guitar and I love listening to music. Anyone who knows me knows that I don't go anywhere without my iPod and some headphones. They also know that I am very opinionated so of course that voice comes out when I talk about music. So here goes my rant.

Ke$ha has some fun songs.. Songs that can get me excited to go out at night and are fun to sing but does she have any meaning in any of her songs?! Not at all. In one of her songs she asks if "you want to have a slumber party in my basement?" NO KE$HA I DO NOT WANT TO SLEEP IN A BASEMENT WITH YOU WHEN I CAN SLEEP IN MY OWN COMFY BED WHERE IT'S NOT DSIGUSTINGLY IN A BASEMENT. Why would she ever ask a question like that? Maybe if she was asking if I wanted to have a slumber party in her room I would consider.. No basements for me please.

Another hot song that has been playing on the radio (too much) is "Like a G6." The chorus goes a little something like this..

Poppin' bottles in the ice like a blizzard (How is poppin' bottles in the ice anything like a blizzard? Far East Movement, please go somewhere where there is snow, aka get out of the bay, and experience a real blizzard because that doesn't make any sense to any sane American. Thank you for making us look dumber than we already are)

When we sip we do it right gettin' slizzard

Sippin sizurp in my ride like 3 6 (Another thing Far East Movement, why are you going to be sippin sizurp in your ride? Thank you for promoting driving under the influence like any great role model would.. You're really making America proud. I also understand that you are from the bay but only a small percentage of people are from the bay when comparing it to the rest of the country so when you say "like 3 6" not than many people understand.. Having a conversation with my roommate we both could not figure out what that meant and finally we figured it out! 3 6 is 3 6 mafia! She is from the bay and I am from Sacramento and we both couldn't figure it out for awhile)

So please Far East Movement, be a little brighter in your music.

Last but definitely not least.. Willow Smith is a new and upcoming artist that is 9 years old. She sings a song called "I whip my hair back and forth." WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?! Willow Smith is 9 years old and doesn't really have hair to "whip" back and forth so I'm a little confused. She wakes up in the morning and turns her swag on (how do 9 years turn their swag on? Is it different than Soulja Boy's swag?)

I would like to thanks stumbleupoon for helping me find a site that has the top 99 upcoming songs. It's the best site ever (www.wearehunted.com).. SO if you want to hear good upcoming music that YOUUUUU can choose, checking out this website would be the best.

Who's your bestfriend?

There's always that question, "who is your bestfriend?" It's a question that time after time will stay the same but the answer may differ. I love my friends, I have more than one bestfriend and they all know that I will be there for them no matter what time of the night it is and they know that I will always love them. I was thinking about "who is my BESTESTfriend?" and I couldn't come up with anyone and then it dawned on me..

My bestfriend is my mom. She's always the one that I will call at 4 o'clock in the morning bawling my eyes out because I got in a fight with a friend or I got dumped by a stupid boy. My mom is always the one to make me feel better when all I want to do is crawl up in a little bawl and die. She's the one that will take my phone calls when no one else will and she is always my backbone when I think that I can't be strong enough for myself. I just kept thinking about what I would do if I didn't have her in my life and I couldn't even imagine it.

IF she isn't going to be my backbone than I don't know who would be. Whenever there is something bothering me, no matter how stupid or idiotic I sound, my mom will always hear me out. She has always been there to root me on with whatever my heart desired and she is the one that picks me up after I have fallen. My mom is everything to me.

No matter how many times someone will ask me who my bestfriend is, the question and the answer will always be the same. My mom. I will still of course mention my fellow bestfriends, but they might come and go. My mom will be there forever.

Why her?

Everyone has someone in their life that they would do anything for. Some have more than one, and some just have one. I have more than one person that I would do anything for. That includes my 12 year old cousin. She has gone through a lot in her life and sometimes I find myself asking the question "why her?" Some of the questions I ask have been answered.

Why was she the one that was born with down syndrome? Because if she never was, our family wouldn't be aware of how amazing and wonderful she really is. I probably wouldn't have such a big heart for kids with disabilities. Hayden with down syndrome has taught me that she isn't just special. She's amazing. She makes me laugh whenever I am down and I can't help but hurt when she hurts too.

So why her? Why did she also have to be born with a heart defect? She had heart surgery when she was really young and we all thought that was the worst of it. We thought that she was now our perfect little angel. She lived through that, she could live through anything. But it's like we never stop getting hit in the face.

A year or two ago Hayden started having chest problems. She got an x-ray and it came back that she had a tumor. They took out the tumor that was benign and she went back to being her cute little happy self. She was cured, well what we thought.. Then about a month ago Hayden was diagnosed with having another tumor. Same type as the last so we all had high hopes.

Why her? Why does she have to be the one with such a hard life? Why does this perfect little girl have to be the one that is hurting? I want to take all the pain I can away from her and do it myself. If I could be as strong as she is, then I wouldn't have anything to worry about.

About a week ago, while back at school, I found out that Hayden's tumor wasn't benign this time and she has cancer. So why her? Isn't it enough that she has already had so many surgeries?

Hayden is my little sunshine when I'm sad. Even when she gets mad at me there's no way that I can get mad at her. She could yell at me and tell me how much she doesn't like me that day and I will love her with everything in me. It's like she can fill up my heart so much that it overflows. So why her? Why does God have to be so cruel sometimes?

It's one question I don't have answered..